2010 has been fine. Not incredible or awful or fantastic or wretched. Just fine. Nothing seems to be sticking out. Content is a word that flows from my lips lately and that is okay for now, I guess.
Sometimes I fear that admitting my being content with life will only cause a shift in balance. That saying it aloud makes it too real and somehow that confession cracks the silence of the stability of where I am in the moment. Now, don’t get me wrong, I am not saying that I am expecting any sort of life-altering, earth-splitting, rock-your-world moment to happen in the near future. But I am expecting for things to change.
As the seasons transform and years seem to fly past me, I am learning to embrace change. Sure, it’s not easy and it’s not something that I would love to happen frequently. Yet, the idea that I have lived in this little bubble has been plaguing my thoughts; that I haven’t stepped out into any sort of situation that has caused me to leave the comforts of home and the security of family behind. (sidenote: What an incredible family I have…couldn’t ask for a better one!) No, I am not going to do anything drastic like move out of the country (I tried that and it didn’t go over so well).
What can I do? I can take those little nudges that have been disregarded in the past and entertain them. Make sure I am leaving my own plans in the dust and walking the path that God has set out for me knowing full well that He has the BEST intentions. Trusting that He isn’t surprised by anything that comes my way. 1 Corinthians 10:13 states “No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. God is faithful. He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. When you are tempted; He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.” (Thank you Mary Jensen for making me repeat that verse OVER and OVER again until it stuck!)
Lately, the Lord has been prompting me to be still. UGH. I literally despise being “still” and why would I want to sit when I could be organizing or watching “Make It or Break It?” Really? Are you sure??
Yes. God always wants us to plan time to spend with Him. That is the only way to maintain our relationship; the only way to fill up our tank. Now that life isn’t all about what I am going to wear to homecoming or what cute boy just winked at me, it has become so much more real that I need to dive into the Word with every single part of my heart, mind and soul.